Courage
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
I was an ardent Atheist when the Serenity prayer first had an impact on me. My boyfriend at the time told me I needed to think about it to help me feel unstuck. Coming from another Atheist, one that I was constantly at odds against, I didn’t really listen to him. Why would I let an Atheist tell me I needed to think about a God thing. What use was that to my life? When I say the Serenity prayer first had its impact on me, I really mean that it didn’t. I shoved it aside and ignored his advice, partly because I didn’t want to believe I needed help, and because I can be fiercely stubborn.
I didn’t need his help. Eventually, I figured out the Serenity prayer on my own and little did he know my catharsis would be the first of our unraveling.
I was maybe the worst version of myself in that relationship. I didn’t feel like I was being “me”. I didn’t feel I even knew who I was. It’s your typical existential 20something quarter-life crisis. Who am I?
My God lines have softened now. I feel the most myself than I have been in years. And I realize it takes courage to be yourself.
From a young age, we are told not to give in to peer pressure, but it’s not that easy. We’re constantly being bombarded with information from the media, advertising, and people. Colleagues. Best friends. Social circles. Strangers. They all have a say on what you should do, and how you should live your life. I’ve been the chameleon, molding myself to other people and their expectations of me for a long time. I’ve let that get in the way with who I am because I didn’t have the self esteem or confidence to assert myself; always yielding to other people. The choice to move beyond that and discover your true, authentic self, takes courage. Don’t let peers or society dictate who you are.
Humans have the ability to adapt to change. When faced with new environments, life threatening illnesses or a life threatening situation, we react and adapt and then either struggle or transcend. Or struggle, and then transcend. This adapting is the stuff that courage is made of. When I think of my situation here and all the people who think I’m “brave” or “courageous” for doing what I’m doing, it’s hard to feel it, because I’ve already adapted. From within myself, I still feel like the same person who’s not-so-brave but when I step outside of myself I realize that I am.
Consider the life of a monk. The monk has found his life purpose in the monastery and seeks to propagate words of compassion. To spread these important and often forgotten actions, he uses the arts to start his own magazine and then publishing company. He shares Buddhist history by opening up museums and colleges. He constantly thinks of new, innovative and entrepreneurial ways to simply fulfill his life purpose, even when he doesn’t have a single penny. He has a mission, a calling and he carves his own path just to be himself. How many people can say they’ve realized and actualized their passions in their own ways? The path to simply being yourself is harder than it seems, but ultimately more fulfilling than living on automaton. Filtering out the information from your peers and from society to listen to yourself is a challenge but it can be done through wisdom and courage.
