A Little More Zen
So remember when I said I “wasn’t Buddhist enough”? Through a delightfully random and last minute turn of events, I have the opportunity to join a four month retreat to study Zen, practice meditation, learn Mandarin Chinese, garden, cook and eat all vegetarian, and generally live a minimalistic, simple way of life. This will be four months of seclusion at a Buddhist temple, all expenses paid for during the program, monthly allowance money given to up to 15 applicants, and an amazing chance of a lifetime for personal growth! The only expense would be my transportation to and from the retreat.
It’s funny how the universe provides when I have a “problem”.
Problem #1: “I’m not Buddhist enough!”
In high school, I began to think about philosophies which aligned to Buddhist thought prior to having read anything about Buddhism. One of my friends even remarked, upon a discussion we had, that I was talking about concepts she was reading about in a book by the Dalai Lama. That was one high compliment, and then, another friend I met likened me to a Bodhisattva (Enlightened being that chooses to reincarnate to help others through their journey to Nirvana. Basically, a teacher, helper and giver.). While I’m far from being Enlightened, or even a sage, both compliments have really stood out to me throughout the years. Although my philosophies naturally align with Buddhism, I choose not to label myself as Buddhist because I simply don’t feel “Buddhist enough”. I’d much prefer taking concepts of Buddhism and Christianity and what have you and apply them to my life in constructive ways. The focus is in living a good life, rather than a good Buddhist life. Despite all this, I could certainly learn more about Buddhism because my grasp of the philosophy is basic, at best. When I say I’m not “Buddhist enough”, days later, the Universe (or you know, the internet) provides me a solution.
Problem #2: My family
As a Westerner, and as an American, it has been a complete culture shock and frustrating to realize that I can not do anything or go anywhere by myself. Every decision isn’t my own decision, but a family made one. If at age 26, my family disapproves of an activity, I am not allowed to do it…
I’m the solitary panda. I’m used to hopping on a bus, or the subway by myself. Walking down the streets of Portland in Old Town, Burnside, Skidmore… the “Bad” side of town without worry. Always keeping on my toes, and my wits about me (a lesson learned through martial arts training), but still not worried nonetheless. I came here to learn about “community” and “family values”. I know that. But the stimuli has been overwhelming at best. For someone solitary, not “getting” family values in my normal life, an only child, and (as much as I hate to say) a somewhat spoiled American, this is unreasonably ridiculous and bizarre. I feel like I’m 16 again, and a rebellious 16 year old at that! If my family doesn’t “approve” of this retreat because it’s different than Catholicism, they can NOT stop me. I’m the outsider looking in and a traveler. I love my family but I have been looking for a way “out” to experience more of the Philippines islands, to travel. It’s funny that my solution for “getting out” is by signing in to a monastery where I will have four months seclusion at two Buddhist temples and no allowance for “going out” and roaming outside the quarters. Despite the intensity, and strict code to simplicity and routine, I think it will be an amazing experience!
It is good to point out that none of these problems are really problematic. With a little perspective shift, they become different things entirely, and always an opportunity for learning and growth.
My first dose of zen came about in book form. The same friend who had likened me to a Bodhisattva recommended me what is now one of my favorite books: Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: An Inquiry Into Values. If the title in itself is a handful, wait until you read the book! I first picked it up my freshman year of college. It was by happenstance that my friend and I decided to randomly wander into an old local bookstore. The kind of old bookstore with a cat, and woman with the “librarian” look. Sure, maybe Zen and the Art of.. is relatively popular and no one wanted this tattered used thing, but there it was when I wasn’t even searching! Immediately, I bought it and read 300+ pages of thick philosophy in under a week; loving every page! This book floored me, changed me, and made me feel alive.
Never, in a million years, would I think that I would ever get a chance to join a monastery, or even feel interested in such a thing. In just about two weeks, I will have a little more Zen in my life. I can’t think of a better way to feel so Alive. I look forward to every (present) moment.
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26 Responses to “A Little More Zen”
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Enjoyed this considerably Floreta – thank you for sharing, and the retreat sounds wonderful…
…rob
Image & Verse
Wow! Fascinating, Floreta. I’ve never read Zen and the Art of … myself, but I think I have a copy lying around somewhere, and may need to read it soon.
What an honor to be called a Bodhisattva. Sounds like you’re already over there. I appreciate your independent attitude.
.-= Jay Hepner´s last blog ..The Pragmatic Alternative recommends. . . =-.
Well if I can convince one person to read Zen.. then my work is complete.
Joking..
Yes, I am very independent.. At times, I feel too independent for this country, that just holds me back. I know my fam just cares about me and wants to protect me but they go overboard sometimes. As snobbish as it is, I am culturally superior to them. I have traversed both worlds (East and West) and I don’t let something new or different scare me into not experiencing new things. If you live your life in constant fear, you won’t grow as a person. For some people, they are perfectly content to live a simple life with little variation and no travel. I am not one of those people. I need to constantly switch things up, change, or I get too bored! For this reason, maybe four months of hardcore routine and simplicity in a monastery where we are constantly monitored will kick my ass harder than living with my family has thus far. But, I’m willing to accept the challenge!!
Wow, have fun!
“The focus is in living a good life, rather than a good Buddhist life. ”
I concur, and I think you can substitute any religion or philosophy in for “Buddhist.” I like the idea of taking what makes sense to you from each of the religions/philosophies and combining that into sort of a personal “best practices” philosophy for life. That’s more or less how I live, and I think it’s done me fine so far.
.-= Kristan´s last blog ..Hair grows back and fiction isn’t real, so take some chances! =-.
Yes, that can definitely be a [fill in the blank].
Yup, it does just fine for me as well!
I just see it as resources. Building blocks to help reference your worldviews. There’s no such thing as original thought, right? 
What an awesome opportunity! I think it’s smart of you to jump on it. Where are the monasteries located?
.-= Keith´s last blog ..A Tale of Two Travel Archetypes: Breadth and Depth =-.
Bacolod and Manila, Philippines
Yeah! I think this will help me grow immeasurable. So excited!!
Wow… that sounds like an amazing opportunity!
.-= Kirsty´s last blog ..When Kirsty met Paula (and Mich!), amongst other things =-.
i know right!? I would be stupid not to take it!
oohhh that sounds like a fantastic experience. i would absolutely love to join such a retreat for a while!
be sure to blog about it okay
.-= Manju´s last blog ..Pretend to be plastic =-.
[...] You a Rose Garden, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: An Inquiry Into Values mentioned by Solitary Panda is on the list, and so many more. Those are just a few that gave me joy, epiphany, a good cry, [...]
Don’t try to set yourself rules for this retreat. Let is happen. Be like a sponge and absorb everything.
I wonder whether you will have time to post in the future? Will we have to wait to get a progress report?
.-= old egg´s last blog ..Death in Venice (with apologies to Thomas Mann) =-.
I like what you say about being like a sponge. I think that’s important in life. My only gripe about it is I have a horrible memory.. So I wish I was more like a sponge!
I will have very limited access. One hour of internet a week! I will try to post some, and write daily in a journal, but for the most part, I think the real progress reports will be after the experience!
I’m envious of you, with such an opportunity. I did a week-long yoga and meditation retreat once, on a mountain in New Mexico. It was one of the most amazing experiences of my life, and I would gladly relive every minute of it.
I hope you get to go!
.-= Ann (bunnygirl)´s last blog ..New Flash Fiction =-.
that sounds intense and amazing as well! i love yoga! i think yoga and meditation are pretty closely related
Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance is one of those books I’ve been wanting to read, and you’ve convinced me to get a copy. Thanks for an inspirational and fascinating post!
.-= Thomma Lyn´s last blog ..The Book that Changed Everything =-.
looks like the family problem you just mentioned is popular all over the world floreta
yes, i’m sure being “americanized” is probably not normal to the rest of the world hehe.
Totally jealous! I’ve been looking into doing something similar, so you’ll have to let me know how it goes!
.-= Colin Wright´s last blog ..Meeting Miss Amber Rae =-.
ahhh! depending on how well this goes, they might be offering more sessions like it next year, etc! the guy which i found out about it from is interested in possibly doing it next year if it’s available. annnyway i will definitely let you know how it goes!! maybe even give the ole gmail a try again
or, skype?
I suddenly remembered the conversation I was having with u on Buddhism that day. Fascinating bits of information…thanks for sharing.One of the most comprehensive posts really!The Beatles were fascinated by Hinduism and great devotees of an Indian ‘sadhu’. Religion often brings about an intermingling of the East and the West.
.-= Deeptesh´s last blog ..Snow dreams =-.
Yes! I know the Beatles were fascinated with India/hinduism and I’d love to go to some ashrams myself!!
Wow, cool opportunity.
I imagine we won’t hear from you for four months — or do they have Internet access there?
.-= Sebastian´s last blog ..Getting my travel horn on, and blog lockdown =-.
Seb – there’s a one hour a week allowance for internet. But, I may or may not take advantage of that. Not sure yet…
i’m kind of jealous of your opportunity. like you i think that the buddhist philosophy would resonate deeply with me. i hope it is everything you hope for and more
.-= ria´s last blog ..trips to wonderland and the bahamas =-.
sounds intriguing. not sure how I would do with four months of seclusion. I can’t wait to hear about your experience!
.-= Dee´s last blog ..Night Wings Part 11 =-.